Scaling back

For years, I've carried huge bags. Sometimes I'd find funky cute ones. This year I've had a big ugly one. Not a big-so-ugly-it's-cute one. Just ugly.

Thing is, my old laptop was a 17" Dell, so it took a big bag to carry it, along with books or my planner or anything else I needed. I even used a rolling bag at times. But last Christmas Santa-Sam brought me a 12" PowerBook and I no longer needed a big honkin' bag. So in the weeks before we went to the UK I sent off for several different smaller bags to carry the new laptop, my camera, some books -- you know, a bag to be the "personal item" you're allowed on flights.

I tried out cute ones. I tried Crumpler, for example. Ended up with a
Crumpler purse and a Crumpler camera bag, but not the messenger bag. Things just didn't fit the way I wanted them to.

I ended up getting three or four bags, and sent them all back because none of them worked.

Until I ordered a Rick Steves bag and somehow, it was just so damn practical, and everything fit. Camera, iPod, laptop, guidebooks, my copy of Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell (yes, I was crazy enough to carry a huge hardcover book with me, but can you think of a better place to read it?) and everything still slid under the seat in front of me. It was comfortable on my shoulder (as comfortable as a heavy bag can be, anyway) and the bottom line was, even though I had a small laptop, I still like to carry lots of crap.

Nobody has ever asked, "Where did you get your bag?" Believe me, they didn't want to know. But not only was it perfect for the trip -- I've carried it with me everywhere since. Loaded down with whatever stuff I wanted to load it with. (One benefit -- I don't think people look at it and assume it's carrying anything worth stealing.)

But the thing it has rarely carried is my trusty huge-ass Franklin Planner (not exactly like that binder, but similar), which is as big as a high school notebook and in my case usually stuffed to the gills. Because in the past year or so I haven't been using it much. Because it's big and clunky. And I have too many big, clunky things in my life, and I end up deciding not to take it, and next thing I know weeks have passed since I looked at it.

This is not a good thing. I barely hold the details of my life together when I write things down. When I don't? Oy.

I've tried scaling back to a smaller size, and I hated it. I didn't have room to write all the stuff I tend to write on the lined page during the day. I found it uncomfortable to write in, and my writing is too big for the smaller lines. Hated it, and went back to the big size.

Until this week. This week I have gone against everything that I know about my habits and myself and went even smaller. I ordered a very-small planner, in a very-cute binder that can also serve as a very-cute purse.

I'm in love.

Of course, I haven't actually tried to use it as a planner yet. And the lines are even tinier. Yikes.

But this is December and in December when I'm planning which new leaves to overturn, anything seems possible, and January seems very far away.

Besides. It's just so cute.

And I can stuff it in my big ugly bag if I want it to but for the past few days I've worn it everywhere and the strangest thing has happened.
Women keep asking me where I bought it.